April Fools!

If I’m being blunt, the only fools I see this April are parents who refuse to work on themself because they believe it’ll be better to spend this energy on their kids. 

Let me backtrack a little bit. In my coaching work, especially with parents, I hear resistance from parents around helping themselves because they believe that those resources are better directed toward their children. 

I understand where this mindset comes from, especially when you’re trained to put your children first. But you cannot put your children first if you’re not propping yourself up. 

We can take it back all the way to psychological theory. In family systems theory, the family system is comprised of subsystems - the parental system, the sibling/child subsystem, and the spousal subsystem. The psychologist who developed this theory concluded, through research, that for an entire family system to be healthy, the spousal subsystem is most important. Without a strong spousal subsystem, the entire family system falls apart. 

But even within the spousal subsystem, both individuals need to be strong - and that requires you, as a parent, to take care of yourself and step out of that parental role to engage in self-care. 

You cannot be there for your children if you aren’t there for yourself. Self-care trickles down - and if you spend the time and energy taking care of yourself, your children will feel it too. 

And if you need one point of encouragement, children respond well to modeling. So if you model self-care, self-love, and self-investment, your children will be more likely to engage in it too. 

Don’t wait to take care of yourself. Start now. And if you need some help or a nudge in the right direction, schedule a free consultation with me. You will never regret taking care of yourself. 

Much Love, 

Dr. Jain