Drink, drank, drunk, sink, sank, sunk

Humans like to run away from things. As a coach (1-2-1, parent, teen, family), I frequently see people running away from their problems - and as a speaker, I’m sometimes tempted to run away from gigs I don’t feel 100% confident in.

Drinking, smoking, sex, social media, binge eating, excessive exercise, are all ways that I’ve seen people run away from their emotions. And though some behaviors are more destructive than others, none of these things actually help people through their issues.

Doing anything in excess feels good when you’re doing it - but the moment you stop engaging in those things, it all comes crashing down and you quickly realize that you’re left with exactly the same problems you started with. And, are often less equipped to cope because of the damage the excess has done.

Take a moment to imagine what would happen if you’d faced your problems head-on the last time you coped with excess instead. How much faster would those issues have been solved? How much happier as a person would you be?

With permission, I’d like to share a story from one of my team members about her experience, to better illustrate my point.

“Years ago, I was dealing with an awful situation in my personal life, and instead of dealing with it, I started running. Literally running - I went from running a few miles a day to running almost 80 miles a week. It was great for my athleticism, but whenever I got home from a run feeling refreshed and renewed, only to immediately be smacked in the face with the things I hadn’t worked through before I left. So I’d leave for another run - or I’d skip dinner and go to bed, and get up to run again early the next morning. I did this for months until I quite literally couldn’t run anymore because I’d run myself into the ground. I had no choice but to confront my problems when I couldn’t run anymore. I’ll never say it was easy - but damn do I wish I’d confronted things earlier. I often wonder what would have happened if I had just confronted my issues earlier. I certainly wouldn’t have gotten a stress fracture, and I would’ve had months more healing under my belt.”

My team member wanted to share this with you to illustrate how challenging it can be to stop running - but also what happens when you don’t. As a coach, I’d also want to send the message that it’s okay if you can’t stop running on your own. Sometimes we need a little extra help - and I’d be happy to be that person for you if you need someone. I offer free conversations that will allow us to explore issues like this and other related problems.

Give yourself some grace if you’re currently running from your problems - it happens, and it’s easy to get lost in the fray. Take a moment to stop running, take off your shoes, and find someone to hand you a towel.

It’s okay to stop.

Much Love,

Dr. Jain