Speak up, speak out!

No matter what relationship you’re in, speaking up is vital in avoiding resentment and fostering longevity. It matters in my relationship with clients as a coach (1-2-1, parent), in my relationship with my team, and in my relationship with my son. Resentment is one of the number one relationship killers - and don’t just take it from me, take it from Dr. John Gottman, one of the most well-regarded and respected relational therapists in history.

The reason resentment destroys relationships is because of the negativity it seeds… and how eventually this will boil over, and destroy the stovetop (aka the relationship).

Think of it like the frog in boiling water - if you drop a frog straight into a rolling pot, it’ll jump straight out of the pot, because it recognizes OW! This sucks! But if you place the frog into the pot when the water is room temp, and then slowly bring it to a boil… it’ll boil to death. It doesn’t realize how much the water hurts until it’s already dead.

Relationships are like that in the context of resentment. If you bring up resentment as soon as it occurs and openly discuss it, sure it might hurt like a bit of boiling water - but you’ll still be alive! If you let it linger, and linger, and linger… the frog (aka your relationship), dies.

Even though we know speaking up is important - that doesn’t always make it easy to do. It’s often one of the hardest things to do, especially when we fear our someones response. So how do you learn to do it? How do you learn to push past discomfort and step into these challenging conversations when they really matter?

My newest workshop “Everything Begins With You” incorporates a lot of this work. As both a professional in the leadership space, and someone with almost a decade’s worth of coaching experience, I have seen first hand the importance of stepping into these conversations, as well as how to help build these skills in individuals. I wanted to create a space where people can not only learn how to build these skills, but be in a supportive space to develop and practice them, and that’s exactly the goal of this workshop.

You will never regret investing in yourself - and investing in yourself with the goal of avoiding resentment, is vital to your personal growth and development. Take the leap. Invest in yourself. And if you’re still unsure… schedule a conversation with me, and learn more about what this worksop can do for you. You’ll never regret working on yourself.