“Who the f**k am I?”

I had one of those moments this week, where I felt like I forgot everything that I know and everything I’ve ever learned. I’ve had this happen in coaching settings, and when getting ready to walk on stage at a speaking engagement, but I’ve never felt comfortable talking about it. 

I realized today it may be a helpful story to share, so here goes. 

I was getting ready for a coaching session this week with a longtime client of mine. She’s made incredible progress, and I am very proud of her. But prior to our session, I was pacing my office, crying. 

I was in what one of my employees refers to as a “doom loop”. Where a negative thought enters your head, and you get hooked on it, looping round and round until you’re emotionally distraught. I was telling myself that I don’t know how to be a coach. That I’m not qualified to do this (despite my literal doctorate in leadership and change). That I’m a bad coach, that my clients all secretly hate me (I’m a mind reader, apparently), and that I will never make a name for myself. 

I ended up calling one of my close friends, who is in a similar field, and she laughed and then asked me, “Are your clients making progress? Are you making money? Are you doing your best?” After three yeses, she reassured me that these feelings are normal and that I’m doing just fine. 

And that’s what I want to reassure all of you. It is NORMAL to feel like you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s normal to feel like you’re out of your depth. It means that you care, and you want to give whatever you’re doing your all.

And if you need help tackling imposter syndrome and boosting your self-confidence, or need someone in your corner like I needed someone in mine, schedule a free conversation with me. You never know what you’ll discover about yourself - and I would be honored to help you kick imposter syndromes’ ass. 

Much love, 

Dr. Unnati Jain